I remember those moments of pure clarity,
before dark clouds entered me.
Walking to school cold, alone,
unafraid.
When my biggest worry was,
“Why doesn’t Stacey like me?”
Then,
all of a sudden, a child
writing letters to her grandmother,
decorated with loneliness.
I remember the feeling,
and this deep sense of knowing;
I’ll never belong here.
Telling her,
It’s impossible to make friends here, Hajjiya!
They keep asking about Osama,
I don’t understand who he is or what he did,
I just know they keep saying I love him?
I keep wanting to ask them who he is,
then ask how can I love him?
But something about me, tells them I know him?
Maybe the cloth on my head?
I remember those days before.
Days, gone,
perished.
Days that turned me into an
Angry Arab Woman,
Fueled by deluded,
colonial
regression.
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